The power of a gentle answer

 

Have you ever noticed that you get defensive and guarded when someone speaks to you harshly?

 A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger Proverbs 15:1

This verse has so much meaning in the way we speak to anyone, ourselves included. Empathy and compassion go a long way to being heard and understood.  Today, take notice of the way you speak to others, in your marriage, with friends, and in business. You may find that the snippy cashier softens her tone when you respond kindly. We often forget that the other person may have a lot going on in their lives that we can’t see.

Your children feel the same way about being spoken to harshly, and they will copy that tone in how they respond back or deal with siblings. When one of my boys is upset he will name call or put down another sibling. Of course, that gets the other boys, going and soon there is a huge shouting match going on. For my passionate boys this can escalate very quickly into something physical all because of the slip of the tongue. Helping my boys to work through their misunderstandings and offering empathy towards their hurt feelings goes a long way to deescalate the situation. 

Proverbs 15:4 reminds us that our words can bring life, but can also pierce like the sword in Proverbs 12:18. It is important to guard your tongue. 

It is time to break the cycle. Choose your words carefully and consider your tone. If you notice that someone is speaking to your rudely try responding with kindness and see if that changes their approach. Most often they felt threatened and defensive. Of course, it can be hard not to take things personally and get offended, and you may mess up along the way. But the more often you respond with a gentle answer, the easier it will become. 

Think about how you would want to be spoken to. Your children, I know, will want to be spoken to in the same way. They long for a listening ear and tender words. Now go out into your day and offer that same love, grace, empathy, and enthusiasm to those around you. Be the magnetic force, that amazing person that every one opens up to because they know you will respond in love. 

Taken from Joyful Motherhood: Deepen your connection with God and your children. 

Reflect

What is God saying to you today?

How is your mood connected to the words you speak?

What are your biggest challenges in offering a gentle response? 

Is there anything about your tone or language God is asking you to change? 

Recall a time you responded gently. How did that feel? Celebrate the gentle loving mother you are.

Bible verses on speech

From the KJV

Let no corrupt communication proceed out of your mouth, but that which is good to the use of edifying, that it may minister grace unto the hearers. Ephesians 4:29

Let your speech be always with grace, seasoned with salt, that ye may know how ye ought to answer every man. Colossians 4:6

Not that which goeth into the mouth defileth a man; but that which cometh out of the mouth, this defileth a man. Matthew 5:1

Set a watch, O Lord, before my mouth; keep the door of my lips. Psalm 141:3

A soft answer turneth away wrath: but grievous words stir up anger. The tongue of the wise useth knowledge aright: but the mouth of fools poureth out foolishness. Proverbs 15:1-2

A wholesome tongue is a tree of life: but perverseness therein is a breach in the spirit. Proverbs 15:4

Whoso keepeth his mouth and his tongue keepeth his soul from troubles. Proverbs 21:23

Pleasant words are as an honeycomb, sweet to the soul, and health to the bones. Proverbs 16:24

Wherefore, my beloved brethren, let every man be swift to hear, slow to speak, slow to wrath: James 1:19

FREE Posters

It can really help the to have reminders posted around the house when you are focusing on changing your behavior. I often tell people that the feelings wall in the house was put there more for myself than the kids. I needed reminders so I could be a good model for my children.

You can get free posters right here

Overcoming worry

 

*If you are struggling with anxiety please speak with your doctor or seek help. This post is not meant to make light of a serious issue or condition.*

Thanksgiving is an antidote to worry.

The world is changing; our life as we knew it has changed significantly. Major world events have a way of rocking the boat and making big waves. As I write this, the whole world has shut down due to the COVID-19 pandemic. It feels unsafe and scary. Every day there is news of health concerns and injustice. Add to this all the pressures of daily life, work, school, and parenting. No wonder we feel a sense of fear and anxiety looming over us.

But we cannot live life in fear. No one can operate well from a place of worry and stress. It will cripple you and shut you down. So what can you do? How can you break free of the anxiety and fear that has gripped you and me?

Philippians 4:6-7 reminds us not to be anxious but to go to God in prayer and to be thankful, then his peace will guard our hearts.

Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:6-7

Thanksgiving is an antidote. It sets your mind on blessings and the source of all those good things (James 1:7). A heart of gratitude fills up with hope. We are reminded of our powerful God who brings us peace.

Yes, even peace in our hearts amongst the chaos and pain. As you give thanks for all that you have and what he has done in the past, God’s faithfulness will reassure you that He will always help you through anything you face.

Notice too that coming to God in prayer, sharing your worries, and giving them to Him will also give you peace. Now don’t just complain and vent and keep those worries in your heart. You need to believe that He will take your anxious thoughts from consuming your energy and time.

There have been many times in my life that I let anxiety take over. The first time we went through contract renewals in our family business worry about our financial stability consumed me. I desperately began looking for ways to earn money and stay at home with my children. To be honest I can barely remember whole seasons of their childhood around that time. Praise God He has taught me an important lesson. I know this world is not all there is for me. I have a heavenly home that is perfect. These troubles here are temporary. I can choose to spend my time worrying or I can live a life of joy. I choose joy.

This was taken from the Joyful Motherhood Devotional.

How can I help my children with worry and anxiety?

Whatever we practice and learn for ourselves we can also teach our children. When you set your mind on the gift and blessings in your life, you also set you mind on the giver of those gifts.

• Tell someone about your worries or journal, don't keep them in your head
• Pray and share your anxious thoughts with God
• Take time to reflect on times when God has been faithful
• Remind yourself of His character
• List your blessings and thank God for all he has done
• Fill your mind with truths, even write them out or repeat them

Bible Verses about Worry and Anxiety

When I am afraid, I put my trust in you Psalm 56:3 ESV

Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. Philippians 4:6

Therefore do not be anxious about tomorrow, for tomorrow will be anxious for itself. Sufficient for the day is its own trouble. Matthew 6:34

Therefore do not be anxious, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ Matthew 6:31

So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand Isaiah 41:10

Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go. Joshua 1:9

The Lord is with me; I will not be afraid. What can mere mortals do to me? Psalm 118:6

When you lie down, you will not be afraid; when you lie down, your sleep will be sweet. Proverbs 3:24

We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ. 2 Corinthians 10:5

Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things. Philippians 4:8

For God gave us a spirit not of fear but of power and love and self-control. 2 Timothy 1:7

Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights, who does not change like shifting shadows. James 1:17

I will give you thanks, for you answered me; you have become my salvation. Psalm 118:21

Give thanks to the Lord, for he is good; his love endures forever. Psalm 118:1

Reflect

What are you worried or anxious about? 

Are you worried about something but have no let go of that? 

Are you giving thanks in all areas of your life? 

Do you have faith and believe that God will give you peace? 

Recall a time when you felt God’s peace.

You are more than just a mom

 

*This post includes affiliate links

You are more than JUST a mom!

Do you ever feel like you are losing yourself in this motherhood role? You used to have passions, hobbies, an identity.

I wear many hats and play many roles as a mother, wife, sister, daughter, business owner, etc. As a Christian another identity I have is in Christ. I am a daughter of the Most High God! A daughter of the King! Wow that is powerful.

Read Galatians 4:4-7

Motherhood changes everything. It turns your life around and consumes you. Your tiny precious baby needs all your attention. Even as they grow children need you. But it can begin to feel like that has become your identity. I want to remind you my friend that you are more than just a mom. Don’t get me wrong, being a mother is to be honored and is very worthy. But you are more. Don’t lose yourself in the journey of parenting. Your children can see that and you will too. Resentment, bitterness, longing, and depression can set in when you think of all the other things in life you had wanted to do.  

I remember slowly packing away more and more of my craft supplies with each new baby I brought home. We needed the space and my handiwork was not a priority. I love to be creative and crafting is my outlet. I didn’t notice the difference in me at first as I was too busy with my boys, but as time went on I began to miss it. One day while cleaning my closet I brought out the sewing machine. My boys were fascinated and asked me to show them how it worked. This opened up a whole new way for my children and me to connect. 

Be sure to keep up with your hobbies, passions, and interests. Share what brings you joy with your family. Not only is it a great model for being a healthy adult, but it will bring you closer too. Your kids want to get to know the real you.

Someone else wants to get to know the real you too. When I say you are more than just a mom, I want you to know you are a daughter too. Not only do you have your earthly parents but, you have a loving Heavenly Father who cares deeply for you. 

You are a daughter of the King! You, yes you the one reading this. You are a princess and joint-heir with Jesus Christ. Can you feel the power and overwhelming love wrapped up in those statements? 

In the same way that your children depend on you for all things, so we can depend on God. He will provide for all your physical needs. Our wonderful Father also gives us wisdom, love, forgiveness, and even correction. As you move through these devotionals think about how your relationship with God is also a reflection of your relationship with your children. As you are growing closer to God, learning principles and truths, you can also apply these to your children. You have many roles in life and, many relationships with family, friends, and work. You are a daughter and a mother learning and guiding at the same time. Some of you may even be trying to re-parent yourself as you parent your children. Never forget who you are, whose child and daughter you are.

Watch on YouTube:

Joyful Motherhood is a 31 day devotional for busy moms. Deepen your connection with God and your children. Now available on Amazon and Kindle. 

Creating a Family Vision Board

 

I had an incredible podcast interview with Debbie Sluys this week. While we were chatting I became so inspired to create a family vision board for our year. Working as a family, you can create a picture of what your family values, and what goals you have for the year. 

This would also be an amazing activity for each family member to do personally. 

Why is a vision board effective

When we focus our attention on where we want to go, what we value most, and what is most important, we begin to move towards those things. Our actions and decisions are influenced by what is foremost on our mind. A vision board helps to create a visual reminder of our goals and dreams.

Our mindset determines our feelings, actions and results. A vision board can be a great way to represent a positive growth mindset.

How to create a family vision board

First decide if this will be a group or individual project. You could do both on separate days.

Ask yourself reflective questions. What is most important to you and where do you want to be going in life?

Gather supplies. You can get as simple or crafty as you'd like. The goal is to inspire your vision of the future. Choose what size you'd like your project to be. You can use canvas, foam core, poster board, computer paper...

Add photos, words, quotes and more to make your vision board come alive.

Share your board with others. Talk about it and get excited.

Display your vision board proudly. Look at it often and make steps to more towards your goals.

Questions to ask and reflect on

• What is important to us as a family?
• What activities would we like to do this year?
• What experiences would we like to have?
• What are our favorite things, activities, hobbies?
• What goals do we have?
• What character qualities are important to us?
• What parts of life do we enjoy right now?
• What kind of difference do you want to make in the world?

Ideas of what to include

• Photos
• Magazine or printing pictures
• Stickers
• Quotes
• Verses
• Doodles
• Writing
• Lists
• Notecards
• Post-It Notes

    Here is my Pinterest board for Family Vision Board

Creating a vision for your year- Interview with Debbi Sluys

In my New Years message, I spoke about creating goals for your year and choosing one word. I knew right away that I wanted to chat with Debbie Sluys about creating a vision for our year.

Listen to the podcast here:

Meet Debbi Sluys

Debbi Sluys specializes in helping people elevate and improve their physical, mental and spiritual well-being, expanding the brain’s potential, and with living intentionally in a state of gratitude and kindness. With nearly 30 years experience in early childhood development, Debbi has gathered a wealth of valuable knowledge about the power of mindset, visioning and success. With her background in professional development and skills in public speaking, Debbi can help you use your brain’s full capacity to reveal your individual dreams, discover your “whys” and accomplish your personal destiny.

Debbi has studied personal development and success for over 20 years, leading people to become their best selves. She has witnessed the science at work and will guide you through it, empowering men and women to find their joy and “Dare to Declare” their destiny.

Debbi guides people to create a clear vision for their future. Allowing themselves the indulgence of being creative and “playful”, people then expand by adding supportive visuals that slowly uncover their dreams and true potential.

Debbi is an enthusiastic and caring Mother, loves children, creativity, travel and sunsets. She is inspired to be living her life’s passion and purpose helping people to vision and soar!

When we create a vision we are pushing past what we just know and trusting and believing in His (God's) blueprint for our lives.

In this episode we talk about:

• Debbi introducing her self
• Debbi's career move from daycare manager to vision boards
• Why it is important to have a vision for your future
• How the brain builds connections - Debbie Mentions Carolyn Leaf
• The power of Images -Power of Vision Board Images
• Creating a vision for yourself personally and your family
• What does it look like to work with Debbi
• Reflection questions
• Your power word for the year

 

How to decide your power word for the year

Chose one word that is inspiring, motivating, and action inducing, that you can use as your lens.

Connecting with Debbi Sluys 

www.Dare2Declare.com

Debbi Sluys (@debbisluys) • Instagram photos and videos

Debbi Sluys (facebook.com)

New Year- New Goals

Happy New Year! I am excited because this is a fresh new year with new possibilities. Although we can not tell what this year is going to be like, we do know our God is unchanging and steadfast. We can have peace going in to this year with confidence.

What are your goals for your family? 
What is your long term vision for your family?

Let's talk about:
One word for the year
Taking baby steps
Recommitting to gentle parenting
Connecting with me

My one word, my goal for myself this year is ABIDE. I came across this work while reading John 15. Jesus reminds us to remain/abide in Him. I feel like the word abide is more impactful than remain. I will cling to, remain, stand firm in my faith to the LORD.

For my family my goal is CONNECTION. I didn't speak to this as much on the podcast episode. But I would like to have a deeper connection with my children and to help them work on their relationships with each other. 

After months of being together, they are starting to get more frustrated with each other rather than closer. I am planning to avoid our usual winter cabin fever this year!

Something we need to remember is that when we try to take on too many changes at once, we often fail, burnout, or give up. Try making baby steps, or doing one small doable change. 

In committing to be a more gentle peaceful parent you may face some challenges. Parenting is difficult. Add to that a pandemic and social distancing, it can be even harder. I wish you all the best this year. Let's make 2021 a year of growth, transformation, joy, and peace.

Christmas Treasures - Lessons from Mary

 

As we get closer to Christmas our thoughts turn towards Jesus' birth. Over the years I have considered different parts of the Nativity. Often wondering what it would have been like for each of the people involved.  There are many wonderful picture books written from a different perspectives. All of which still choke me up year after year at the birth of our Lord Jesus Christ.

This year as I have been wrapped up in the middle of writing a devotional book for mothers, a single verse stuck out in the book of Luke. 

"But Mary treasured up all these things and pondered them in her heart." Luke 2:19

 

My mind has been focused this year on the connection between our relationship with God and how that is reflected in our relationship with our children.

Here we see Mary soaking in everything that has been going on around her. Remembering most likely her visit with the angel Gabriel, her miraculous pregnancy, Jesus birth, and the visit with the shepherds. So much to take in all at once especially having just given birth, and in a stable! God had come down and touched her life very personally. He was real and faithful in His promises. So Mary treasured this moment in her heart. There were no iPhones around to snap a photo. Mary could not even grasp the magnitude of all that had happened. But she knew it was a special moment and this was an incredibly special baby.

As a mom I can relate to Mary. The miracle of birth, even in all the chaos that follows, amazes us as we hold our precious new born. These treasured moments connect us to our little one and the One who created this little miracle.

In the busyness of life do you still take time to treasure moments and think about them?

Do you stand in awe of all God has done in your life? 

Do you pause during your day to be present with your children? 

To savor the moment and take a picture in your mind. There is so much more to remember than a photograph can show. The feelings, the events surrounding that moment and the significant meaning of it all. Some times as mothers we get caught up in the details of life, our to-do lists and work. Time passes all too quickly and we realize we rely on Facebook memories to remember special events in our lives.

Take a lesson from Mary. This Christmas I encourage you to take the time to thank God for all the blessings in your life. Consider the magnitude, wonder and events of the first Christmas. Worship Jesus, who came personally into the world to rescue, love and forgive us. And be sure to pause in the midst of your festivities to enjoy being with your kids. Treasure all these things. Store them in your heart and think about them.

For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also. 

Matthew 6:21

Huge List of Christmas Countdown Ideas

Anticipation is mounting for Christmas day. Many families like to countdown the days until Christmas in a special way. Advent calendars are hugely popular and there are many other ways to count down...

Christmas Countdown Ideas

1. Treats in a store bought or homemade advent calendar
2. Small items in a store bought or homemade advent calendar
3. Notes of appreciation or love notes
4. Quotes and verses in an advent calendar
5. Holiday surprises (Sparkle stories has a wonderful Holiday Magic series) this involves receiving a daily hidden note with an activity to do.
6. Audio story countdown (Sparkle Stories has several that we enjoy)
7. Wrap 25 books to read one each day
8. Hang a special ornament on your tree each day
9. Jesse Tree - Reading parts of the Bible from Genesis to Jesus
10. Paper chain
11. Move the nativity figures closer to the manger scene
12. Advent Spiral
13. Do a different activity each day as an alternative to treats in your advent calendar. This could involve family activities, crafts, outings, movies and more.
14. Acts of kindness (donate, serve, volunteer, give, help, surprise)
15. Read a portion of the nativity story
16. Learn a new fact around a Holiday theme (check out our unit study ideas)
17. Watch a Christmas movie each day
18. Add pieces to a photo or scene each day
19. Reverse advent by collecting one item to donate each day

What my family is doing

Our family has a nativity set up and a pathway leading to the manger. Each day Mary and Joseph move closer. One each of the Sundays of Advent we add more to the scene. Week 1 rocks and minerals, week 2 plants, week 3 animals, week 4 people. We love seeing the display build up over the month. All the pieces have been lovingly made over the years by the boys and myself or purchased from very special markets.

We really do slow down on homeschooling in December but I like to make sure our focus in on Jesus. I have so many great theme ideas, so I asked the boys to vote on what they'd like to learn about.  This year we are learning about the different symbols you might see around the holidays. We will learn about one symbol a day along with some activity that relates (sort of, hopefully).

Below is a list of what I'm doing with my boys. It isn't in too much detail but there are links to some pages and my Pinterest board. If you'd like to hear more send me a message or follow us on social media.

Symbols of Christmas

Advent 1 – Rocks and minerals – Read part of nativity story 

Last day of November surprise note about our December theme and adventure 

 1. Candy cane – Luke 2:8 also story of Candy Cane, Jesus is our Shepard – candy cane experiments, hook candy canes game 

 2. Wreath – John 19:2 – Crown on Jesus’ head, God’s love never ends -make a wreath 

 3. Angels – angels appeared in several places in Nativity story – make angles out of nature

 4. Candles – Luke 1:79 – Jesus is the light of the world – make candles, go out to see lights 

 5. Bells – ring out to announce the coming of the Lord – play with all our musical instruments

 6. Advent 2 – Add nature, keep reading nativity story

 7. St. Nicholas – Fun symbol, read Santa story book, leave surprises in shoes, leave surprise treats for friends too 

 8. Holly – Matthew 26:28 Blood of Jesus, sharp like the crown, gather nature to decorate house  

 9. Fir tree – John 3:16 Represents eternal life and points to God – set up the tree 

 10. Star – Matthew 2:2 Star above Bethlehem – make origami or paper stars 

 11. Colours – red is blood of Christ, green is everlasting, gold symbol of royalty – art work, get out all our supplies, sensory bin

 12. Caroling – Luke 2:13-14 – listen to music- watch video about story behind a song, dance party 

 13. Advent 3 – add animals, read about shepherds in nativity story

 14. Christmas Crackers – read about them, how are they made, buy or make some. 

 15. Ornaments – make some ornaments, 

 16. Cookies and food – make cookies, try some Christmas food from a bakery 

 17. Cards – read about cards, make cards for friends 

18. Poinsettia – tell story of poinsettia, visit garden centre 

 19. Gifts – Matthew 2:11 – gift of the magi – wrap presents and go shopping 

 20. Advent 4 – Add people, read about Jesus

 21. Spiral, Winter – make our own spiral, read about spiral, maybe invite friends 

 22. Mistletoe  - read, find some silly Christmas games - new game  

23. Nativity scene – watch a movie, read a different perspectives 

 24. Stockings – tell a story about stockings, set out ours, Christmas eve gift to open

What does your Advent calendar or holiday count-down look like?

For more ideas check out my Pinterest board 

Moms Supporting Each Other Interview with Ashley Davis

Can you imagine the incredible impact we'd all have on the world if mothers could gather together and support one another? Some times it feels like we are all in this together, yet mom shame and guilt is still such a problem.

Today on the Joyful Mud Puddles Podcast I chat with Ashley Davis a fellow homeschool mom and podcaster.

In this episode we talk about:

Honest real motherhood on social media

Mom envy

Importance of community

Mom shame

Build your own spot on the wall from Nehemiah

Preparing for the Holiday season - have a plan, self care

Build your own spot on the wall

While we were talking Ashley brought up the story in the Bible from Nehemiah where the Israelites are rebuilding the wall of Jerusalem. In Nehemiah Chapters 2-7 we read the prophets accounts of rebuilding the wall, the favour granted to him by the king and also of the opposition they received.  

They were working with all their heart on a common goal to rebuild the city God had given them. In the face of much ridicule and opposition they prayed and trusted what God had put on their hearts to do. But notice that each individual and family worked on their own spot on the wall. They did not compare, or give advice. They did not put each other down either. This is what our lives should be like also. Working together towards one common goal wether it be homeschooling, parenting, living as Christians, we don't need to obsess with what everyone else is doing when we have our own work to be done.

When our enemies heard that we were aware of their plot and that God had frustrated it, we all returned to the wall, each to our own work. Nehemiah 4:15

Later when the opposition gets stronger Nehemiah stations guards and equips the Israelites while they work. We also need to be well equipped for the enemy to attack. Look around and see who is surrounding you. Will the protect you? Will they encourage what you are doing? Have they got your back? We need to surround ourselves with the right support system, our tribe who will help build the wall together. 

When all our enemies heard about this, all the surrounding nations were afraid and lost their self-confidence, because they realized that this work had been done with the help of our God. Nehemiah 6:16

Never loose sight of God's hand in all we do. He sets it on our hearts to continue in the paths He has for us. God is there to help every step of the way. We do not need to carry this burden alone.

Connect with Ashley

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100015625036151

Instagram https://www.instagram.com/_thehomeschoolconversation_

The Homeschool Conversations Podcast https://anchor.fm/ashley-davis42/

Holiday Season Unit Study Ideas

Many families slow down on their school work over the holiday season. But you don't need to completely stop (unless you want to, which is totally okay too). Here are some fun themes you could learn about or play around with. How deep you go is really up to you. You could even incorporate these themes into an advent calendar.

Holiday Season Themes

1. Different Names of Jesus or God

2. Holiday book novel study

3. Different winter celebrations and holidays

4. Holiday traditions around the world

5. Winter weather unit

6. Animal adaptations and how they survive (including hibernation, migration and adaptation)

7. Holiday symbols and what they represent

8. Study the story or history behind select Christmas carols

9. Christmas or holiday foods from around the world

10. Children's picture books, book study or even write your own

11. Jesse Tree - move through the bible from Genesis to Jesus

12. Character study of different people from the Nativity

Where to get materials? 

I'm not affiliated to any special sites. I keep it really simple and use what I find online. Others have put a lot of thought and work into creating fabulous materials. Sometimes I'll get a flash of inspiration and come up with my own ideas. I'm not one for spending too much on new curriculum or books but these are sites we like:

Teachers Pay Teachers

Pinterest

YouTube and Google

Local Library

This year I asked my boys what they wanted to learn about. After choosing their favourites from the list we settled on Christmas symbols and their meanings. You can Check out my Pintrest Board Here.

What activities do you do for a Holiday Unit?

This really depends on your own personal goals and priorities for the Holiday Season. I always recommend keeping things simple and focused on creating connections.  That said there are lots of activities you could include depending on your theme:

• Reading books
• Watching related videos
• Write a story
• Cooking or baking related to the theme
• Crafts
• Art projects
• You may find math activities
• Madlibs
• Writing prompts
• Getting physically active
• Sensory play
• Games
• Telling others about what you learn in some way

What is our family doing?

Below is a list of what I'm doing with my boys. It isn't in too much detail but there are links to some pages and my Pinterest board. If you'd like to hear more send me a message or follow us on social media.

Symbols of Christmas

Advent 1 – Rocks and minerals – Read part of nativity story 

Last day of November surprise note about our December theme and adventure 

 1. Candy cane – Luke 2:8 also story of Candy Cane, Jesus is our Shepard – candy cane experiments, hook candy canes game 

 2. Wreath – John 19:2 – Crown on Jesus’ head, God’s love never ends -make a wreath 

 3. Angels – angels appeared in several places in Nativity story – make angles out of nature

 4. Candles – Luke 1:79 – Jesus is the light of the world – make candles, go out to see lights 

 5. Bells – ring out to announce the coming of the Lord – play with all our musical instruments

 6. Advent 2 – Add nature, keep reading nativity story

 7. St. Nicholas – Fun symbol, read Santa story book, leave surprises in shoes, leave surprise treats for friends too 

 8. Holly – Matthew 26:28 Blood of Jesus, sharp like the crown, gather nature to decorate house  

 9. Fir tree – John 3:16 Represents eternal life and points to God – set up the tree 

 10. Star – Matthew 2:2 Star above Bethlehem – make origami or paper stars 

 11. Colours – red is blood of Christ, green is everlasting, gold symbol of royalty – art work, get out all our supplies, sensory bin

 12. Caroling – Luke 2:13-14 – listen to music- watch video about story behind a song, dance party 

 13. Advent 3 – add animals, read about shepherds in nativity story

 14. Christmas Crackers – read about them, how are they made, buy or make some. 

 15. Ornaments – make some ornaments, 

 16. Cookies and food – make cookies, try some Christmas food from a bakery 

 17. Cards – read about cards, make cards for friends 

18. Poinsettia – tell story of poinsettia, visit garden centre 

 19. Gifts – Matthew 2:11 – gift of the magi – wrap presents and go shopping 

 20. Advent 4 – Add people, read about Jesus

 21. Spiral, Winter – make our own spiral, read about spiral, maybe invite friends 

 22. Mistletoe  - read, find some silly Christmas games - new game  

23. Nativity scene – watch a movie, read a different perspectives 

 24. Stockings – tell a story about stockings, set out ours, Christmas eve gift to open

No matter what you choose for your focus this season I do hope it is full of Joy and Peace.

How to Support your teens - Podcast Interview with Charlene Clark

 

Teenage years can often throw parents for a loop. It is so wonderful that there is support and guidance available. What a blessing to chat with another mom to share her wisdom and advice on connecting more with your teens.

Charlene Clark is the founder of Legacy Moms, a program geared toward Christian mothers who desire more resources and support for themselves & their teens. She is passionate about teaching & empowering children to recognize their potential. She is a certified K-6th grade teacher and also has many years of experience as a ministry youth leader. She is full of ideas, resources and optimism for what is possible when it comes to cultivating our children to walk in their purpose.

During this episode we talk about:

• How Legacy Moms started
• Family life
• How to support your teen
• Creating an open line of communication
• Tips for parents with teens
• Family time together
• Conversation starters
• Love Languages (By Gary Chapman)
• Focus on relationships
• Parent self-care
• Kids and hobbies and activities

Connect with Charlene

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/legacymoms2020

Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/683388885504237/

Website: https://legacy-moms.yolasite.com/

Top tips to help manage the overwhelm

How are you doing mama? Are you managing and coping okay?

There is so much going on in the world and in your life. I wonder if you wish you had the coping skills to deal with it all. Maybe you feel like the joy has been sucked out of your family or you just aren’t experiencing motherhood or parenting the way you wish you were. 

You are not alone. I can very much relate to those feelings. I am right there in the trenches with you and I know where you are coming from. In fact I bet you have a friend or relative who is feeling the same way. I encourage you to share this post and podcast episode with them. Today I’ll share a few things that helped me go from overwhelmed and frustrated to confidence and peace!

 

First is mindset because what you believe about yourself and your situation is more likely to come true. Your thoughts dictate your feelings and those lead to actions and results. 

I start with mindset first because parenting is all about the parent! Most families I work with come to me because of challenges they face with their children. I share strategies and tips that work, but without working on yourself first those are just going to be another tool that you tried and didn’t work. 

Take a moment and think about these questions:

What are your thoughts about yourself as a mom, woman, and partner? 

Who are you? The real you? 

Write down your beliefs – they may come from childhood, relationships, experiences along the way. Find scripture to counteract those limiting beliefs. Let’s rewrite the story, the lies you have been telling yourself. 

Corinthians 5:10 We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ. 

Philippians 4:8 Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things. 

You see when you believe in yourself and in the amazing God who can carry you through anything, you will bring that energy into your day. You hold the space. 

• I am not smart – If you ask for wisdom God give it freely (James 1:5) 
• I am a mean mom – God did not give us a spirit of timidity but one of power love and self control (2 Timothy 1:7) 
• I can’t change or I can’t do this - I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me (Philippians 4:13) 

More tips for Mindset 

• Journal 
• Do a daily affirmation 
• Write down verses and quotes your bathroom mirror (go ahead and take your kid’s window markers!) 
• Daily devotionals 
• Pray and ask God to reveal to you those limiting beliefs and guide you to His word that will overcome. 
• Gratitude journal 

Self Care 

It is not selfish to care for yourself. It is essential. You hold the space for your family. If you are not at your best, or working on that, it shows. 

How often do you worry about the amount of veggies your kids are getting? How many about obsessing over your kids’ sleep habits? I bet your kids are being cared for in the most amazing ways, and yet as moms we can get through the whole morning and realize we haven’t even gone to the bathroom yet! Am I right? 

I get that you are busy and don’t have time. But there are some very real practical things you can do to help care for yourself. YOU need to realize your value and put yourself as a priority too! Take time to focus on your sleep, food and exercise. Do these things with your kids to get the whole family involved. 

More tips for self care 

• Set a timer to check in 
• Drink more water 
• Focus on breathing 
• Do one thing every day for yourself that you enjoy! 
• You are not just a mom, when you take time to rediscover yourself you inspire your children too. They are watching. You are modeling (good and bad) 
• Go for a walk 
• Get outside 
• Accomplish something (do a task, yard work, check off a list) 
• Listen to music 

Coping Skills 
These are strategies and techniques to help you manage. Some are self care of course. There are different types of coping skills such as calming, physical, distracting, and processing. Try many out to figure what works best for you. Do them as a family as that will benefit your children too. Make a poster if that helps as a visual reminder. 

Community 

You are not alone. I know I’ve said that before but do you believe it? It can be very humbling and awkward to accept help but when we do we open up the doors for God to work in both lives. 

• Let people whom you trust, know you are struggling 
• Keep searching for like minded families 
• Find a listening ear 
• Get help and accountability 

Final thoughts 

It may take time but, progress is better than none or getting worse. It is not wasted time but it is an investment in the future, in your family, and in your self. If you want me to check in on you send me a message or let me know in the comments. I believe in you. 

If you found today’s message helpful PLEASE share it with others, invite your friends to join the community, leave a rating and review, connect with me. 

Here are some links I mentioned (let me know if I forgot any) 

Positive affirmations Pinterest board 

Self Care Pinterest board

Feelings Pinterest board